Tips for ‘Latchkey’ kids

In today’s busy world, more and more families have become two-career households, while many more families survive on the income and work of a single parent. As a result of these working families, the number of “latchkey children” is increasing. Latchkey children are ones that are given the responsibility of taking care of themselves after school until their parents come home from work. It is not always the best decision and should be the very last option considered, according to Mary Pegler, Director of Child Life at East Tennessee Children’s Hospital. However, if parents find their families in this situation, Pegler offers the following guidelines to help families make the best of the circumstances. “The first question a parent should ask before leaving their child home is ‘Are they ready to be left at home?’” Pegler said. “A child may tell you he or she is scared or doesn’t like the idea of staying alone. Most parents can use their parental intuition to decide whether they are ready or not.” It is important to explain to the child why he or she is being asked to spend part of the day alone. In the explanation, parents should include why both parents or the sole parent are working and why other arrangements are not possible. “This explanation should alleviate any feelings of rejection the child may be experiencing,” Pegler related. Before a child is left home, the first thing they should be able to tell you is their full name, address and phone number. They should also know how to reach one or both parents in an emergency, whether that means by cell phone, work phone or pager. It is important to be able to trust a child left at home, but they must also be able to trust that in an emergency they can reach someone. Establishing a set of guidelines for the child’s behavior in advance alleviates questions that may arise at a later time and may also ease the minds of parents’ who are leaving their children alone. It is important to have children go through the plan with the parents and first establish a daily routine for coming home, letting themselves into the house and going about the “normal” day at home alone. This will provide the child with personal confidence and also help the parents feel better about leaving the child. Parents should consider the following questions when establishing rules for their child alone: • Establish where a child goes in an emergency. • Plan and implement a fire escape plan and route. • Plan and implement a “bad weather plan” with directions for tornadoes or natural disasters. • Teach the child not to enter the house if the door is ajar or a window is broken – go to a neighbor’s or friend’s home to call a parent. • Teach children to lock the door behind them, even in the middle of the day. • Teach children how and when to call 911 and Poison Control. • Teach children to call a parent, neighbor or “point person” once they arrive home. • Teach children not to answer the door for strangers. Parents may also want to set rules for the following activities or behaviors: • Establish which snacks are appropriate and the rules for cooking while alone. • Can children play outdoors? If so, where and for how long? • Are friends allowed over? For how long? Are there restrictions on what they are allowed to do? • Can the child watch television and, if so, what programs? • Should the time be spent doing homework or chores? Pools, trampolines, skateboards, bicycles and motorized toys should be discussed, and safety procedures should be decided as a family. “Allowing children to be involved in the rules and decisions they must abide by will help with their confidence in staying home alone,” Pegler said. Emergency phone numbers should be posted near the telephone, and children should be well-trained on how to use the phone for local calls, emergency calls and even long distance calls. When answering the phone, children should never tell the caller that their parents are not home; instead, they should say that their parents are unable to come to the phone. Although phone contact with a parent may be easy and possible, establish a relationship with another adult, such as a neighbor or another family member, for the child to contact or go to if the parents are unreachable or far away from children.